So...I’ve got this thing. I tend to look forward with great anticipation toward the future. More specifically, I want to begin the next step in life. Always. From what I hear, this isn’t particularly uncommon, though I think, at times, I can take it to an unhealthy extreme. I have to be reminded to stop, take a breath, and enjoy life the way it is now.
Lately, there’s been a lot on my mind. I am in India. I have a full research project ahead of me. I have a Christmas break in England, a possible trip to Paris, a semester in the near future. I have a life ahead of me. And I’m excited for it! I look forward to my life. I’m ready to turn the next page in my life. I know what happens now. What happens next? I want to live. I want to experience the next step. I want to know what happens next.
Yesterday, I ate peanut butter. It was not an inherently incredible experience. Peanut butter is peanut butter. Granted, here in India, it’s difficult to acquire. It’s expensive. But it’s still peanut butter. But in that moment, I was able to forget what I was doing in the next few weeks and months. I was able to forget my impending research. I stopped making plans for Christmas break. I stopped wondering about next semester’s classes. I sat on my cement floor, and I ate my peanut butter.
It was as if the peanut butter acted as a mental relaxant, and I was calm. All unnecessary knowledge dribbled out. I didn’t feel the urge to think about my future life. I didn’t have to predict where I’ll be in five weeks, or next semester, or two years from now…twenty years…I knew where I was, I knew where the peanut butter was, and I was happy. It was enough.
It may seem strange, but to me (and this is, after all, my blog), this is what blogging should be about. It’s about snapshots in your life, and in your thoughts. It’s about the times you forget context, you forget surroundings, and just contemplate. It’s about the times you take out of life to live. It’s about the little moments. It’s about eating peanut butter in India.
